John Carter Movie Review by Duffy Bear
I’m Duffy Bear.
This is my first movie review……… – so just ‘bear’ with me….. – okay that wasn’t ‘beary’ funny…….
Okay, okay – getting serious now ——
Me, Duffy Bear, well I’m one lucky bear! I saw a sneak peak of the John Carter movie at Disney’s Hollywood Studios because I’m an annual pass holder.
Since this was a sneak peak preview, we had to turn in all of our recording devices to the security humans. I didn’t mind turning in my iPhone, but this was the first time I was without it since I got it for Christmas and I felt almost naked!
They wanted to make sure that no one pirated the movie. But Pirates? That’s SILLY! You can’t miss a Pirate. The Pirates do their plunder at the Magic Kingdom and besides, Pirates don’t use iPhones, cameras or other recording devices. Oh, well_
I thought the movie was super fabulous! Is a really cool, awesome-a-tasmic, super blockbuster adventure. John Carter lives on earth, but then gets sucked up to another planet called Barsoom. He meets big tall 8 foot green monster creatures that have a really neat, cool way of talking. They had to show the words on the screen so we earth dwellers knew what they were saying.
I hope RosettaStone comes out with a how to learn the 8 foot tall green monsters from Barsoom language. That would be neat! Anyway it was funny when the king of the 8 foot tall green monsters called John Carter a girl’s name. That King could use that Rosetta Stone too.
John Carter also gets beat up a lot, but then he becomes a Superhero!!! I want to be a Superhero and jump around really high and far like John Carter….. ‘cause Superheros are super awesome-a-tasmic.
There was part of the story that was well, kinda predictable. They had to tell us why John Carter was so angry, sad and defiant, so even though you are waiting around to learn that part of the story, the way they told the tail was timed well, creative and most important, it kept me interested.
Mommy said that the actor that played John Carter was hot, but I never saw my mommy take his temperature. Anyway………
One of my favorite parts was the funny looking creature, with the blue tongue & 6 legs. He barked like a puppy dog – and he ran really fast. No, like, I mean really super fast – so fast that he disappeared until he was in the new place. That’s the type of doggie that only a superhero can have.
The ending of the movie was cool too – John Carter goes back to being a normal human, but then he figures out a way to go back and be a superhero again.
Even though I have one question that the movie didn’t answer, are humans really Martians or are Martians really humans, I’m giving the movie John Carter a full 5 FootiePaws! and definitely recommend you go see this Awesome-A-Tasmic BlockBuster on the big movie screen this weekend – ‘cause this is definitely a big movie screen adventure.
And that’s my movie review of John Carter. I hope you go and enjoy it!
…And thank you for bearing with me on my very first movie review!
Enjoy the moobie,
A.K.A. Duffy the Disney Bear